Actually you can be as well … if you want.
Imagine you are planning a big BBQ with all your friends but then last minute a thunderstorm is coming up. You can’t change the weather but it is your choice how you respond to the fact. You can either dwell how unfair life is or you can decide to still have the best party ever and take actions accordingly.
Nobody and nothing in the world (not even the weather) can force you to respond to a situation in a certain way. You are always able to react in the way of your choice. You are response-able.
At every moment of your life, with your response, you take on the role of either the victim, the haunter or the rescuer. (You can also be the observer if you are not affected). Usually we tend to take on one of the roles more often than the others – and this role determines how we live our lives.
Still this role in life is not fixed. In every interaction we change the role several times. For example if we feel as the victim we often start to defend our self, get aggressive and with it start to be the haunter. Quickly it becomes a vicious circle, where people blame each other.
In the end everybody loses and all involved people feel as victim in one way or the other. The only possibility for a good, lasting solution is to step out of that vicious circle.
👉🏻 Stay calm, be neither aggressive nor give up
👉🏻 Decide consciously for the alternative: solving the problem together
👉🏻 Avoid power games
👉🏻 Stick to the facts
👉🏻 Don’t blame but explain
👉🏻 Repeat until successful
What is your choice in life?
Did you ever take on response-ability and try to change your favorite role?
Leaf a comment and let me know what happened